Life over the past year and a half has really put things in perspective. I’m a very thoughtful person. Some might even say meticulous. I care a lot about a lot of things, but I’ve arrived at a place where I now know that some things simply aren’t worth the time, energy, or stress that comes with being a person who cares a lot. Here are three of those things that I’ve come to care a lot less about.
1. Curated Feeds & Instagram Growth
Once upon a time having a curated feed was what set you apart as an Instagram creator. The cohesive editing style that presets gave you plus the structured grid made it clear that you weren’t just the average user. There were all these informal rules: try to balance out different styles of photos, alternate between selfies and full bodies and half bodies and I could go on and on. But now, it really seems like none of that matters because people want to be entertained and they want to see what’s real. The perfectionist in me resisted this truth for quite some time, but spontaneous posting is way more fun than waiting a week to post something because it looked better in the feed that way.
Similarly, I think I’ve reached a place on Instagram where I’m more than satisfied with the online community that surrounds me. It’s tempting to forever set goals around follower count, and I still have some to an extent, but there has got to be more to social media than wanting more followers forever. It’s a great accomplishment when you reach milestones, but I’ve reminded myself that when I started creating it truly was for the fun of it. The added benefits of more followers, brand deals, and other opportunities are the cherries on top, but this really and truly was for me.
2. Achieving the “perfect” body
Funny enough, I think it took me reaching a point of consistency in my workout routine, to realize that working out to change my body was so tiring. I love what working out does for my mind, and the changes I’ve seen in my body, as a result, are great. But it hit me that I actually had no intention of building a booty (lol) and that the only reason I ever chased that was because of what society says is desirable.
Now, I’m not trying to look like anyone but the best version of myself.
The BBL wave is real high right now and I’ll never be mad at anyone who wants to change their body through cosmetic procedures to make them happy. But as someone who used to do all the squat challenges and the like, I realize all of that was coming from a place of chasing societal norms about what I should look like as a Black woman. I don’t want to chase the IG baddie aesthetic because that’s just not me. Now, I’m not trying to look like anyone but the best version of myself.
3. Having a Concrete Career Plan
Not caring about this is huge for me. My whole life thus far has been defined by hitting one goal post after another. But as I come to know myself better than I ever have before, I’m learning that I have many passions and talents. To limit me to a set path would a) be flat-out unnecessary in a society that’s constantly developing new industries and careers and b) give me too much credit over a life that is fully in God’s control. So when people ask what type of law I want to practice or what I want to do, it’s a huge area of growth for me to say something like “I’m still trying to get a better sense of what’s out there.” That doesn’t mean I’m doing life in cruise control or that I’m doing life without planning ahead. It means I’m more excited to experience the surprises God has in store for me because I know they’ll surpass even my wildest imagination.
Moral of the story? Care-free is the place to be. And I hope you give yourself the chance to let go of caring about things that are holding you back from being your happiest, most joyous self.
“Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us” Ephesians 3:20
